WS1008: How Your Spouse Plays A Role In Your Success

EPISODE 1008 

[INTRODUCTION] 

0:00:00.0 ANNOUNCER Welcome to the Real Estate Syndication Show. Whether you are a seasoned investor or building a new real estate business, this is the show for you. Whitney Sewell talks to top experts in the business. Our goal is to help you master real estate syndication. 

And now your host, Whitney Sewell. 

00:00:24.000 

Whitney Sewell: This is your daily real estate syndication show. I’m your host, Whitney Sewell. This is our final episode in a series with my bride, my amazing wife Chelsea. And we just go into more in-depth about her role, really, and our partnership and such an important role could not have done any of this without her and just her supporting me 100% in all of this. We have been a team, and she’s my most important team member to say the least.

 

But I hope this helps you to think through as you pursue your business or your syndication business. And the level that you desire to do that, your spouse needs to be on board in a big way. So, I hope you learn a lot. I hope you will continue to connect with us and reach out to [email protected] or connect on the website. And, we would love to help you. 

 

00:01:16.0

WS: One question the listener had was how you’ve watched me grow through all of this, and I think we… not just about how I’ve grown, but I think we also… we can share about how we have grown… you’ve grown, our family. How it’s changed things. But first, what do you think about that?

 

0:01:30.2 

Chelsea Sewell: Yeah, so we’ve talked a little bit about how God used military and police work and federal agents and all of those things to bring this character in you, when he’s very humble, so he’s not gonna talk about a lot of this, but there’s not many like him, if there are any… And he has great faith, he has great motivation, he works harder than anybody I’ve ever met. And those things that God did in his heart. And I think real estate brought those things out even more for him. And so, the fact that he learned that you keep going and you can’t give up, well, that character is in there and has been stirring and working, but real estate venture really brought that out and caused that to be exercised. He also is great with people, he can talk to people, and he’s really humble. And so you really like talking to him because a really good listener, and that’s why he’s awesome at this podcast, because he thinks about how he can bless other people by the questions he has and how he can promote other people on his show.

 

And he’s just so good with people and his humility is just so attractive. He is a great leader, and so I think as he has these team members, they just love working with him because he’s a good leader. He’s able to encourage them to do good and great work and just be helpful and creative.

 

And so, he personally has grown in all, in so many other characteristics, because real estate has brought those things out that have been stirring in there and seeds of things, and so real estate has helped grow all of those characteristics for you. I could go on for a long time, but anyway, I just think all of those things and all of your character is a big part of the attraction of working with you and Life Bridge Capital and what you’re doing is that you’re just this amazingly humble, gifted guy with this character. And people just see that as attractive and they wanna be partnering with somebody like that

 

0:03:52.9 

WS: I hope everyone who is listening, this is because of a strong life at home as well. The support of Chelsea has helped us all of that, if not all. I would go back to also when we were at the farm, before we bought the farm that we sold that we talked about, that’s when I had read The Miracle Morning and really made me think about how I’m spending my time in the mornings, and I won’t go into all that. Now, I’d talked about it many times on the show, but what that led to was more consistent learning, I think in reading, I’ve read more books since that time than I ever have in my life, I was not a reader.

 

0:04:30.0 

CS: We used to talk about we go on a date and we’d go to Barnes and Noble and we get in

our early reading moments for dinner, 15 minutes, like we would just browse the books and be like, “Oh yeah, I kind of like a bookstore, this is great,” and then that would be all the reading, what we would do, we talked about, but yeah, we’re readers now.

 

0:04:46.2 

WS: I think that constant education has helped to motivate me and educate me as far as being an entrepreneur around the mindset, but it’s just business in general as well. I don’t think you were born just being a businessman or a woman. And I think you are groomed to be that you educate yourself to be that one way or the other, you do learn those skills, and I think that constant education… Obviously, you’re gonna be talking to your spouse, I hope you are, about what you’re reading, and I think we both learned a lot through that, just that habit change. Right, and not sleeping in, and I don’t know that we were really sleeping in any way because it was in the horse training and all those things at the same time, feel agent and family. But I started being more purposeful with that time and reading and sharing what Chelsea, and I think it was consistent education for both of us to help us both grow in the mindset piece as much as anything, which led to many other things…

 

0:05:38.2 

CS: Yes, it’s been very sharpening for both of us, your journey. And I am very thankful for you rubbing off on me over the last several years in what you’ve learned in who you are, and he doesn’t let me complain, so it’s good, it’s really good. It’s just he’s been so encouraging by his life and example, and he’s not that he says, “Don’t complain,” but he doesn’t, and his life is just so encouraging to be a part of.

 

0:06:05.6 

WS: This process has been difficult. I think we’ve stressed that time and time and again during this interview, but I know that there are listeners who are thinking, Well, my spouse is just not on board, or my wife or my husband, depending on who the listener is, they’re just not gonna go through all of what you all did. And for one, I would say it’s not necessary to do it exactly like we

did, or that intense… you got to think about how fast do you wanna get there, right? There’s so

many things that we could talk about there, but in this moment, maybe you have some advice for the listener or just working with their spouse, or even from really the issues we had with that first real estate investment, those apartments that we talk about, the two triples, which were so difficult at that time, but you were so on board, obviously in a big way in pursuing commercial real estate.

 

Why were you on board? I know we talked about it a little bit, but what should the couple be thinking about right now and for their spouse?

 

0:07:08.7 

CS: So, I remember, I actually think it was Dave Ramsey, and he talks about that if there are many issues in the marriage, it’s not a money problem, it’s a marriage problem. And I think about that for us, that the unity in the thought and being together on the idea and keeping the big picture in mind and thinking long term, it just needs to be a daily habit to do all of that.

 

And so, the marriage is where I would start with making sure that it’s something that you are both in faith for, that you are both unified in the thought, and the marriage is where you start, because that’s just the foundation for the vehicle to get there. There’s a proverb that says It’s better to live on a rooftop and in a house with a nagging wife, and it’s funny to think about, but I think we have to think about the truth in that, that if I was the nagging wife or that, if you were the angry nagging husband or whatever in the midst of it, it just wouldn’t work, so the marriage is where you need to start. You have to make a choice, you have to choose consciously, I am going to get up and support this person day in and day out, and long term, and you do, you just have to make that choice, you have to make it every day, you have to make it in the beginning, you have to make it when you’re frustrated, and God is the only one that changes heart, so again, it’s just a lot of prayer for your own heart as well during that time. Your prayers matter, wives, husbands, your prayers matter. God is not a vending machine, you’re not praying to change his mind and give you the things that you want, but God uses our prayers as a part of his unfolding plan. And so, we pray seriously for each other and for the business, and we watch Him work, Be still and know that I am God, and I feel like that’s been some of what we’ve done by His grace.

 

0:09:07.1 

WS: Yeah, it is a decision that needs to be made before you even start, I think through that, just to decide that you’re going to support one another, and you know from the beginning, there’s gonna be difficult times, but you’re gonna be unified from the beginning and making those decisions together and really open lines of communication, very important, but no doubt your prayers matter the morning routine, like I talked about that changed, I think Chelsea’s morning routine as well. During that time when I started getting up early and doing these things that encouraged her to start getting up early, and that has changed everything, just in our business at having that educational time and whatnot, but Chelsea had earlier too, just the time for us together when I was working so many hours, she’s working so many hours in the home, it was time for us to still connect. Right, you need to make time for it. No matter what, right? It was time for us to talk about the week, talk about the kids, pray together, it was just crucial that we had even 30 minutes in the morning. 

 

Hopefully longer than that at times, but just that time to hold her hand and pray together, or us talk about life in general, just time to listen and to talk, and I would say listen more than talk, which is so important, right.

 

There’s so many things that the Lord has done to bring success in this business and a success, but I also feel like we have so far to go. I know many dream about where we are now, and we dreamed about it not too long ago. There’s many things that happened, and I’ve talked about it in the show often, but one thing too, I would say is not only the word sustaining us during a very

it was a difficult time working so many hours, but also through partnerships, and one thing was, I was a… obviously, went to mini-conferences and even after doing this for a good while, I was asked to partner many, many times and said, no. 

 

I work too hard to… For us to just throw it all the way in the wrong partnership or to make a quick dollar or to lose all the trust and respect of our investors, and I’ve been working so hard and long to gain. However, Chelsea and I, again, have been praying, mostly Chelsea, consistently praying for the right partner, and I was at a conference and I was introduced through a common acquaintance to Sam who you all have heard, and you do some interviews now also on the show. And, it was obvious that Sam was very talented and had complementary skill sets. And so, that was crucial, he had been working in the business really hard, we had been working really hard in the business that had different parts of the business. And a long story short, the last out of the conference, I approached Sam and said, I mean, it was like 10 o’clock, 10:30. Now, I’m in at 1:30 in the morning, a flight back to Virginia, and this was in Denver, but I just said, “Hey, you Sam, you wanna get some coffee,” we talked. I quickly just said, “Chelsea and I’ve been praying for a business partner for a long time. You seem to fit the bill. Would you be open to discussing it? Maybe a partnership.”

 

And I made it very clear that it doesn’t mean we’re going to partner, but it did mean that I would like to learn more about him and his family and just what that would look like. He took me to his home, briefly on it, he ended up taking me to the airport, but he took me to his house and met his wife like 11 o’clock at night, but he was excited about the partnership as well, but that’s where it began, and that partnership the Lord has blessed that partnership in a very big way, so thankful for Sam and his family and his children, and even his parents, and they’ve mentored us in many ways, they are just amazing people, but that’s through prayer as well and how the unexpected things… How the Lord has provided skill sets that we’ve needed to build our team and have allowed us to move fast, and even other partners. Those people that wanna partner with us. That is completely unexpected. That just doesn’t make sense. Honestly, to me, I think that this person could partner with anybody in the industry, but they reached out to want to partner with us, and I’ve seen those things happen and how the Lord has worked many times in ways that just don’t seem to make sense, but man. He’s provided. Anything you wanna add to that, Chels?

 

0:13:11.9 

CS: Yeah. The partnership has just been huge for Life Bridge capital. And again, I think you are doing what you’re doing excellently, and Sam does what he’s doing excellently, and God brought two wonderful skill sets together to make just this machine of business and partnership. And I think people even in the industry that look in from outside or people that you have on your team can look and say, “there’s not many people doing what you guys are doing right now, and it’s just all the hand of the Lord blessing and bringing opportunity and those kind of things.”

 

0:13:49.2 

WS: Awesome. Also, I have to say our family has been supportive. They may be skeptical at first, right.

 

0:13:55.9 

CS: Why in the world are you selling this beautiful farm and moving and doing all these crazy things?

 

0:14:01.3 

WS: And we probably didn’t talk about that enough early on, just we did mention that we received some kind rebukes, which were from loving people, right. So I’m not so loving, but mostly our church family or personal family did maybe question, it seemed very odd that we’re selling this amazing place. And to everyone looking in, all of our sphere of influence at the time, we had had great things going on the farm, the federal agent position, which seemed amazing to most, making “great money” compared to most at a job, and especially with no college, all those things, so it seemed crazy. Right, I know it did, probably more than they even voice that we were planning to leave all of that. But, I think now they see it and obviously are very supportive, and I just wanna say we couldn’t have done it without the support of church, family and our personal family and yeah, we’re just grateful to be where we’re at now. And I’ve not worked the federal agent position for almost exactly a year now, and it’s been amazing.

 

So we did… We sold that farm and we didn’t share about it, but our Chelsea did share a little about it, but we did buy another farm and we moved, and within a week after closing on that farm, I left, I put in my notice for the agent position, and we left and we said, “You know what, it’s now or never, I cannot continue working this many hours, and I was just missing too much, it was just had to happen.” It’s either we’re gonna leave the real estate business or we’re going to  have the federal position one.

 

And we weren’t going to stop the real estate business at that point for sure. So we’re on a farm now, and… Anything about that, Chelsea, that you wanna share?

 

0:15:50.3 

CS: Yeah, it’s a dream that we gave up then, we just love having a place for our kids to run and play, and there’s some really neat value in farm work and taking care of a horse and responsibility and things like that for children, and we value all that. We just kind of enjoy our time out here in the client with nobody else, and all those things, and so we just gave that… We don’t dream up for a while, and it’s just the kindness of God that he’s given back to us, and so we’re just really enjoying that, and it’s a great tool, I think in our family and for our children to be able to live out here again.

 

0:16:27.2 

WS: I’ve not shared this on the show, I don’t think ever, but our horse training business was called Straight Path Horses, straightpathhorses.com. The website is still live, so you can go and check it out and see the commitment level that we even had to that business, and there’s not many people that were doing things, there’s very few that can do the things with versus just the

tricks and all kinds of things that we were training horses to do at that time, and…

 

0:16:52.3 

CS: We were not training horses, Whitney was training horses. Let’s be clear about that.

 

0:16:56.8 

WS: But you’re welcome to go check that out, and I say that to say if you do watch the video of Shamrock, he’s a specific horse that we sold. He was probably the last horse that we sold, the best horse that I had. And it was difficult selling him and another one, but specifically the reason I say him is because a year after buying this farm, the owner of that horse, Shamrock, bought another horse from us years before that, unfortunately, and they had to put her down, but he still, Shamrock, he was older and I wasn’t able to probably keep riding like he had been and offered to sell Shamrock back to us. 

 

So, it’s just amazing to see the Lord work in that he was taken care of extremely well, and obviously we jumped on the opportunity to buy him back. It was just perfect timing. We had the farm, now I can make my schedule, we’re still working on that all the time. But you know, I can now make time for some writing again, and I’m just so thankful to have that horse bag, not as any more… If you go and watch that video, Shamrock at straightpathhorses.com, you’ll see why.

 

And all the work that we put in that I put into training him to be the horse he is now. But not only that, just that my boys can ride now and I have that time freedom to be with them, we’ve done more camping this year than we ever have and it’s more time as a family, which has been very needed after what you’ve heard over the last couple of years. So we’re grateful, we’re forever grateful to the Lord and sustaining us and what He has done for pushing us to do the foundation, for pushing us just in commercial real estate and for pushing for the time freedom that we have now. And so, we just share all of this to share that it’s very possible and it’s possible and bigger ways and you’ve probably ever dreamed of, and it’s just more. 

 

I’ve met so many individuals recently too, that pushed me to think bigger and outside of my box of Morven multi-family and commercial real estate, and so it’s just a never-ending growth journey, personal growth and spiritual growth for us in our marriage and in our family, and now we have the time freedom to think a lot differently than we’ve ever thought before. Anything else else, Chels, before we wrap up?

 

0:19:08.2 

CS: We’ve talked about a lot. To God be the glory. It was all I can say. We’re blessed by His kindness, and even though I’m not discounting all the work, but even all of that is just sustained

by him. So, just really thankful for sustaining grace and the blessing, and I just… I get up and I think he’s given us all of this, and just ask him to help us be faithful, that we can use it for our good and His glory.

 

0:19:35.1 

WS: Also, and I think Chelsea, just the unending support, just 100% along the way is so supportive could not have done it without her. Obviously, our entire team, but I called Chelsea and our children even are hidden team members, ’cause now whenever they talk about their family and the support that’s needed there to make this happen. So very grateful, also grateful to our investors who have been so loyal in these deals and deal after deal and the desire to partner with us, it’s just incredible to watch that journey from raising $250,000 or so and numerous weeks for the first syndication to now, tens of millions in a few hours. It’s incredible. It can only be done by the Lord, that’s not the norm. But it’s just the Lord. Also, I just wanna say thank you to you, the listeners, for supporting over a thousand shows now, I know many of you have been here from early, early, early on, I hope that you were sharing the show. Obviously, we hope you’re sharing to show and helping others as well, through that, we would be forever grateful, we hope that if you have questions that you’ll reach out, that you will go to Life bridge Capital, there’s ways to connect with me personally there.

 

If you have questions about adoption? Chelsea and I would love to talk to you and help you. We schedule calls, families often that just wanna ask about our experience and we wanna help you with fundraising, we wanna help you think through different things and different international versus domestic at options or whatnot, we’re happy to help and schedule a call personally to talk through that with you and your spouse, and you can go to lifebridgecapital.com as you know and connect, or you can go to the Life Bridge Foundation and learn more about the foundation. 

 

Obviously, the families that we are partnering with would be grateful for your support there as well, if you choose to do that, but either way, you can learn a lot more about us . HAve a blessed day.

 

00:21:25.0

WS: Four-part series, I hope that you were able to make it to all four parts, and now you know a lot more about my journey, my wife Chelsea, and just how we had to be on the same mission to make this happen and how the Lord has guided us through every step of the way. I hope you have been inspired.

 

I hope you now are equipped to think differently about your business and being more mission-minded, but even just including your family in that process, and even if you had a bad deal years ago in the very beginning, that doesn’t mean you still can’t make it in this business. But I hope you have learned a lot. Please connect with us at lifebridgecapital.com.

 

0:22:04.0 

WS: 1,000 shows. Can you believe it? I can’t. I cannot believe we have recorded more than a thousand interviews with experts in this business. We could not have reached this milestone without you, our listeners. I am personally grateful for each of you that are listening, and I hope that you are learning more every day from the interviews and the experts that we’re having on the show. Just to say thank you, I want to offer a gift to the first 100 listeners that sign up. You need to go to the website, to the podcast page, Life Bridge Capital, there’s a short form to fill out just so we can send you a gift to say Thank you. But it’s only for the first 100. I look forward to connecting with you. Please reach out if we can help in any way. 

[OUTRO] 

0:22:53.0 ANNOUNCER: Thank you for listening to the Real Estate Syndication Show, brought to you by Life Bridge Capital. Life Bridge Capital works with investors nationwide to invest in real estate while also donating 50% of its profits to assist parents who are committing to adoption. Life Bridge Capital, making a difference one investor and one child at a time. Connect online at www.LifeBridgeCapital.com for free material and videos to further your success. 

[END] 

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